Reflection

Today I find myself in a place of reflection gentle, honest, and sobering.

This week did not go as I had planned. I did not plan to be sick. It came unexpectedly, interrupting my rhythm and slowing me down. And while I know that sickness is not the will of God, I am reminded of the truth in Scripture that many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.

Not as punishment. Not as harm. But as a quiet reminder that I am not in control of everything.

I am feeling much better now, and for that I am grateful. But in these past few days, something deeper has been stirred in me an awareness that without this body, the vessel God has given me, I cannot fully walk in the things I desire, even the things He has promised.

Health is not separate from purpose. It sustains it. And I see now that I need wisdom.

This week, I introduced too many changes at once new supplements, a visit to the chiropractor, adjustments to my routine. And when my body reacted, I could not even discern what caused what. It made me realize how important it is to move with intention, to build slowly, to understand my body rather than overwhelm it.

There is a wisdom I have not yet fully embraced. There is a rhythm I have not yet mastered. And there is a consistency I deeply desire.

I think back to seasons in my life where grace carried me so strongly. I remember praying for the discipline to exercise, and how, after that prayer, something shifted. What once felt difficult became natural. I showed up consistently, even joyfully.

It was not just effort it was grace.

I remember how structured my eating was during that time, how accessible healthy options were, how my environment supported my discipline. And yet, over the years, especially since 2013, something has been out of alignment. I try, and then I stop. I start, and then I lose momentum.

But tonight, I am not condemning myself. I am recognising a truth: I have the knowledge. I have the resources. But I need the grace.

The same grace that sustained me before. The same grace that made consistency feel natural. The same grace that aligned my habits with my desires.

Tonight, I also reflect on my body’s signals sneezing, nausea, exhaustion. Symptoms that seemed confusing, almost contradictory. Nothing severe, but enough to remind me that something is asking for attention.

And so I choose not to ignore it. I choose to learn. I choose to listen. I choose to steward my health with wisdom, patience, and grace.

Because I know what Your Word says that by the stripes of Jesus, I was healed. Not just spiritually, but wholly. Completely.

And I desire not just to know this truth, but to walk in its manifestation.

To live it.

To embody it.

To sustain it.

Tonight, my prayer is simple:

Lord, teach me how to live well in the body You have given me.

Teach me how to build a rhythm that I can sustain for all my days.