As I pen these words, I am driven by the desire to remember my current state of heart when the long-awaited breakthrough finally emerges. Two years have passed since I stood amid the pinnacle of my career, reveling in a role that satisfied my deepest professional yearnings. My job allowed me to innovate, to create from the ground up, to influence and elevate others daily. My performance not only met but exceeded expectations.
Yet, in an unexpected turn, the CEO of my company, acting on inexplicable aversion, served me with a section 189— a notice of retrenchment. Notably, I alone faced this fate. Although I found new employment for which I thank God— His provision ensured I was not left adrift—this period has been marked by unease and disillusionment. The work now does not invigorate me; I yearn for more. My trust in God’s plan remains steadfast; my heart aches for restoration, for a role that reflects the skills and passions He has instilled in me.
“Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him…” (Psalm 37:7 ESV). I’ve clung to this wisdom, mourning the lost time and adjusting to a lesser role, cognizant that sharing too openly about past grievances may invite misjudgment in our society.
Yet a breakthrough pierced through last night. In forgiving the CEO, I felt a welter of bitterness lift. My deliverance feels near, though the path has been arduous. I articulate this now so that when advising patience to another, my words will come from a place of deep empathy, knowing the tangled emotions one endures in waiting.
This season of hardship has deepened my prayer life, prompting cries to God I had never before uttered. “In my distress I called to the Lord, and he answered me” (Psalm 120:1 ESV). I am grateful for His unceasing presence and lessons learned in the throes of struggle.
Moreover, I acknowledge a critical lesson from this job— I overlooked a sign from the Holy Spirit. To live outside God’s will for two years has taught me the precious value of alignment with Him. Lord, I beseech You, keep me ever aligned with Your divine plan.
I am grateful to You, Father, for You have sustained me even when I strayed from Your path. With an open heart, I await the next chapter. I trust in Your promise, believing that the forthcoming season will nurture and honor the purpose You’ve sown within me.
Wells of Wonder 